Beer humour

I was reading mrbrown this morning and I came across this site.
Check out my fav. Hilarious.



Those of you who thought that I looked like a girl finally got it figured out.

The Coming of the End

The End of the year is coming. And like every other year, I like to spend some time in quiet solemn reflection of the year’s passing.

I flip through the pages of time, looking for something worthy of memory. And like watching a black and white movie, I see myself orchestrating in some cinematic moments that still lingers at the back of my head.

Reminiscing these moments sometimes brought a smile to my face. Like a perk to my day, a pat to my back, it swells the goodness that is usually intangible.

Moments when I seem to be operating with the right side of my brain, doing things that way I did that even the now wiser-by-experience me approve of.

It is nice to know that as we grow, our action, our thinking are no longer laced with illogical immaturity or peppered with petty emotions that withheld the better side of us at bay.

Reminiscing other moments however brings other feelings. In a mind’s eye, I remember the times when I have felt that way I felt, I have been touched that way I have been touched. I remember being sad. I remember being angry.

And many times over, I am acutely aware of the situations that I have gotten myself into when I seem to lack better judgment.

In a different light, I see many different faces of myself staring back at me. There has been nice and bad Andy. Joyful and cheerless Andy. Humble and pompous Andy. Gracious and aloof Andy. Loud and quiet Andy. Even-tempered and prude Andy. Expressive and inert Andy. Comforting and satirical Andy.

To many others, year 2005 could have been a year of harvest. Many could have reaped the seeds they sowed, tasted the sweet fruits of their labours or found the treasures that they seek.

I know that I have nought. I am still plowing the fields for my own treasures.

With a sigh, I know I will soon close another chapter of my life with the knowledge that I shortchanged the year with too little done, too much left undone.

What is Christmas to you if you are not christian?

You reckon?
There are many choices.


On a past Christmas, I celebrated with my cousins.

We had the night all to ourself, all crazed teenagers then.
(adults and dogs not allowed)
Any event without 'parental guidance' was a big hu-ha then.
We were quietly having our mini party in a dark humble room, lit by candles.
We were humming Christmas carols all night.
We did the '10' seconds countdown to Christmas.
And in the neighbouring background, many others as well.
And at the end of it, we screamed "Merry Christmas!!" and gleefully cut our pretty log cake.

That Christmas I learnt about blissfulness of family ties and carefree teenage life.


On a past Christmas, I went a friend's house to join his family's celebration.

It was a simple affair.
Totally heartwarming.
Food was great but secondary.
The people were all we need to embrace the night.
The night could not be complete without the random cute cute wailing toddlers and hyperactive kids to entertain.
I love to watch kiddies running around the estate playing catch. while I try to trip them with a well-placed foot
Reminded me of my own long forgotten childhood.

It was then I realised with my dimwitted mind that most of the time, it is the simplest pleasure in life that casts the light.
That Christmas I learnt about simple pleasures.


On a past Christmas, when I grew out of these simple pleasures, I went for something more exciting.

Clubbing on Christmas' eve was all talk among our friends, the hips and geeks alike.
Dressed to the nineties, we drop down to Zouk for the big bang.
Alas, even the hippest among us were only amateurish compared to the Christmas crowd.
Why, the amount of bombshells in the vicinity could put Saddam Huisinsane to shame, with his elusive weapons of mass destruction and all.
In fact, my eyes grew so accustomed to hunks and babes that I could not stand the sight of the ugly dunce I saw in some random mirror in the club. "bleah!"

That Christmas I learnt to simultaneously drink my vodka, shake my bomboms and gorge on eye candies, all while holding my piss. (because the toilet was no-go zone)


I reckon Christmas is about merry making between people, christian or not.
I reckon Christmas is about sharing between people, christian or not.
I reckon Christmas is about people making time for other people, christian or not.
I reckon Christmas is about people, not about christians.

You reckon?

This Christmas I'm looking forward.
Merry Christmas people!!

This is what we call quality education...

... which can only be found in SIM.

As we all know Sillypore is on her way to emerge as a educational hub in the region.
Therefore it is paramount for Sillypore to raise the standard of education, remake local institutions to be competitive on the global platform.

And what we really need now is educational institutions like SIM, constantly geared at improving quality of its students in all aspects.

Even if it means making effort outside the textbooks...


Friendship, Courtship and Love workshop is here to make the difference...


You know that you have made the right choice to place your future with SIM when you receive this in your inbox.

Move over SDU!!

*
SIM stands for: Sillypore Insatiety for Mashing the doxies
*

First impression..

... is a very funny thing.

It catches you right there where you, when you are least aware.
Like a lurking shadow in a dark alley, it pounces upon you.
Without hope of vindication, you are caught in its web, a prey in its manifestation.
You might feel pretty much helpless, opinions of you they tend to keep.
A amplitude of which, can be as vast as distance between heaven and earth.

Some say it represents a static image of you in my mind.
Something deeply imprint but not of very much of relevance.
Something that is often exaggerated, a veil over what reality really is.
Something so volatile, that you might want to discard but it dangles like a sticky web upon you.

Some say it can be as beautiful as a dream.
Something that someone might cherish, without reason nor rhythm.
Something that can give a very subtle taste, moulding that perfect condensation of you
A lingering memory.

With no wrongs or no rights, I urge you to keep that impression. Of me. Of things. It is the liberty of it that make me feel alive. A total freedom of my mind, my cerebration. A right I relish. A right to love and hate. A capacity to be loved and to be hated.

And one day when we are old and cranky, maybe we will sit around and have a good laugh over it.

"Hey, I remember you had a good ass, asshole!"

*
How about we play a little game?
I am thinking bartering of first impressions.
You give me a sincere description of who you initially think I am, and I give you mine.
One for one.
No fibs.
*

What I think you think

I think you are having a bad day right now. Are you not?

I can imagine you sitting there in the corner of your room. Doing nothing in particular, thinking of nothing in particular. But yet thinking. I can imagine the look on your face, like you always have, the quiet brooding expression that tells me much. Sitting with legs cross, hands cross and face down, it transcends to me a prose that feels so uniquely you.

How long do you intent to sit there? Are you waiting? Are you hoping? Are you waiting for hope? Are you hoping that waiting gives you an answer?

Or maybe hoping as in waiting is not so distant to you. Is it bitter sweet? Do you find the feeling comforting in familiarity? Irony isn’t it.

Will it help if I give you a call, or drop you a message? Will you feel better? Will it soothe the pain, nudge the spirit or make the passing of the day more bearable?

And if I am to send you a message, it will probably go like this:
“Hi yoz, wanna have dinner?”
Innocent and non-suggestive. Very everyday. Concerned.

But will you come? Or the corner of yours is more appealing? Will you shudder away, discomforted? Do you not want to go out and face the world so huge and limitless that threatens to swallow you up whole, sorrow and all? Is there no place for you? Does the world, in its vastness but yet its denizens, crowd you out?

Know this that fear is but an emotion, a state of mind, which can be overcome by a greater state of mind. Know that while you fight your battle in that corner of yours, you are equipped with nothing more than a splitting mind.

Know that when you shrink your world into that corner of yours, it is just a choice. For the world is much more than that corner that is everything to you. The world is limited by your perception of it. It in itself is limitless, borderless, spanning through ages and time.

I think you are having a bad day. For if you are not, it will be a terribly unfair world for me to ponder this over while you are having the time of your life, no?

Little drummer boy

Little drummer boy waits at the corner with his little drink, slipping away, observing.

He looks at the people around him.

Some of them are eating.

Some of them are talking.

Some of them are laughing.

Some of them are mingling.

Most of them are acting.

But little drummer boy just sits at that corner that is his, doing what he always do, thinking.

Little drummer boy knows these people, but yet he does not know them.

He does not know what to say to them.

He does not know what they are saying to him.

He does not know the point of this charade, extensively and tad too deliberately done.

But he knows he must smile.

Little drummer boy feels like an idiot, smiling there at his corner, hoping no one notices his disinterest.

Not that anyone cares.

They are all too engaged.

Engaged but, just like little drummer boy, disinterested.

It’s obvious to little drummer boy that some of their eyes speak of dissent, but yet the faces portray otherwise.

Little drummer boy wonders if they enjoy what they do, although he suspects not.

Little drummer boy pitied them, but he knows they are respect worthy.

Little drummer boy does not like what he sees.

Little drummer boy makes a mental note not to be what he sees.

Little drummer boy can only hope.

Fire!! drill...

Wow~. I just had my first ever fire drill this morning (besides the NS ones lar). It served as an interesting distraction from daily routine rather than a safety-habit-inducing exercise.
It’s quite a laugh, observing the progress of the exercise.

You hear the fire alarm going off but you know it is just a fire drill when:
1. The fire warden who is charged with all-important responsibility of making sure everyone is accounted for and escorted out via the fire exit is still typing away gleeful at her desktop.

2. Your colleagues are more concerned about saving that goddamned long report they having working on all morning rather than saving their ass by walking out in a “fast and orderly manner”.

3. The security guard asks you to show your staff-pass at the exit.

4. Beautiful colleagues trying to be more beautiful by applying generous amount of cosmetic along the way. Not that, while standing under the blazing sun, any makeup will be altered perfectly to resemble a monkey’s red ass cheeks. Come hellhound and fire, I just want to look beautiful.

5. Your colleague went to starbucks for coffee before going to the assembling area. It’s along the way he says.

6. Every single pedestrian walking pass looks our way with such bemusement in their eyes that you will think the spectacle of a thousand-strong mustering is actually the star awards in commencement.

Nevertheless, it has been a great-in-some-way-damn-boring-in-others-one-month at work so far.

Working do has its perks. So far I have enjoyed quite a collection of freebies. Free T-shirt, pizzas, ice cream (both for the mouth and the eyes if you know what I mean…), cakes, lunches, even a free flu vaccine.

Yah you saw that right, a free flu VACCINATION jab worth at SGD$20. In frigging Sillypore. When it’s frigging out of stock in the market. Wooh~~ talk about welfare. Not to mention the hours I spent surfing, blogging, walking, talking, blah….

Oh my. Your eyes are glowing green with envy.
Think not? Click and think again.

Three more weeks for work. Have fun guys.

(edited) I just realised that my code for the button does not work on firefox. :(
Try IE.

Repercussion - much to learn

I am never a political guy. But this is interesting news. Especially for those who are business students, it's best to understand where we really stand on the international platform.

They (Australians) now know what Singaporeans have long endured; that in becoming one of the world’s richest people, Singaporeans don’t enjoy democracy – at least not one Australians would recognise.

Read here.

Here's a different perspective. This blog is pro-gahmen one ok. I love my country and the people governing it. I cannot stress this more. because I don't want to be charged as a seditious blogger.

That call

My heart skipped a beat, a little more than surprised at the name indicated on the phone screen. Numerous questions bombarded my little scrawny brain in that split second, rendering it incapable of basic comprehension.

In a short pause, I regain my composure. Calming myself with a long deep breath, I tried answering the call with a firm voice. A much gentle, softer voice than usual. There was nothing out of ordinary over the conservation. But still, I conversed with much jitter, fumbling over words that were block out by more conspicuous thoughts. She wants nothing more than some company. I should have known.

With much consciousness of what a fool I am making myself to be, I hasten to end the call with minimum jabbering. I hope I did not appear to be insincere, but the level of miscomfort, the maelstrom of misgiving thoughts, is terribly unsettling.

Why is she calling me, after so long?
Why now? After I decided it is not possible.
How can hope be so frail but yet last so long?
She is just a friend isn't she? I am just a friend ain't I?

Some very disconcerting thoughts that are teeming my mind even til now. I realised that despite deciding to shift my focus away, somewhere deep within the recesses of my heart, I have a place for her. A little void that I sometimes pitied my indecisive self over.

My heart is much colder now. Any affection left in me are probably buried deep down somewhere in my baby toes that I rather hide from prying eyes. No amount of biting spirit can I drown out these depressive conceptions. No amount of sobering liquor can I detoxify the slow poison that chills the heart.

A long lost cause, I have no doubts.

The white Christmas Sillypore never had

Christmas is around the corner. Here's a Bob Rivers production, "White Christmas". Just the way I would have wanted.

(edited)
Due to strong response(?), the bandwidth allocated to me has been maxed out. Better luck next month for those who may want to view the clip. So much for free storage space

Special thanks to evilwhiteguy because I unscrupulously copied it from his blogsite for the spirit of sharing. obliviously

P.S I love that dog.

It left me pondering...

... about life. And of the cruel vestiges of ill fate, left to hunt those who cared.

While we preoccupy our time in those things that we do, necessaries and unnecessaries alike, petty arguements that we had, occasional lamenting of cruel fate, it amazed me how blind I have been.

Read these news. Tell me how you feel.
Tomorrow's tribute to Idler
Idler's blog, entries days before her...

Another touching story.
A strong girl to a strong women

Speak up Sillypore people

Hi, readers who gracefully bestow me with your precious time, over viewing my little escapade to rediscover myself, that despite the erratic pace of the world you have come and join me in this long and arduous journey. Blogging is hardly any fun without being sweetened by your kind presence, that I must assure you, is gratefully appreciated.

Now, mindful that Internet media is inherently interactive in nature, may I request a more active participation on your part to enlighten me with your broader and worldly-wise perspective.

Please be welcomed to comment via the chat box that I copied from a friend’s blog site have installed for your convenience. And if you are attention shy, please feel free to exploit the cloak of anonymity to slam me post your views.

I thank you for your pious effort. if any